Sports Radio Satire: Miami sports radio stations announce they’re ceasing operations

LeBron James

MIAMI —

Miami’s four sports radio stations — WQAM, WAXY, WMEN and WINZ — issued a joint statement today announcing that with LeBron James heading back to Cleveland, each station will cease operations at the close of business today.

“This wasn’t a hard decision to make,” said Joe Bell, of WQAM. “As soon as we read LeBron’s letter on SI.com, we knew, immediately, that it was time to pack it in for good.”

“What else would we really have to talk about?” asked Dan Lebatard, of WAXY, 104.3 The Ticket. “While we all tend to pretend to care about the Dolphins, everyone, everywhere knows we don’t give two shits about the Dolphins unless they win — and that hasn’t really happened for decades. And the Marlins? The Panthers? The U? Please.”

This move is unprecedented. Never before have four sports-radio stations in the same market ever ceased at the same time. But never before has LeBron James screwed a city as he has Miami today ... unless, of course, you ask the now-joyful people of Cleveland about what like was like in the summer of 2010.

“We will miss having our local jobs,” a distraught Sid Rosenberg, of 640 Sports, WMEN, said. “But this, of course, opens the door for my long-rumored return to New York. And of course it helps I am on the air this week on WFAN — I can go right into (Mark) Chernoff’s office and hand him my resume. I just hope he says ‘yes,’ and brings me back.

“Screw the rest of their talent. No one is as good as I am or can bring to the table to energy I bring to my shows on a daily basis. No one at all.”

It is not immediately clear what will replace the four sports stations. But it did make for an opportunity for WFAN’s Mike Francesa to take a shot at Miami radio.

“I have no ideer how they had one sports stations, let alone four, OK," Francesa said. “OK?”

What are your thoughts? Comment here, on Google+ or on our Facebook Group.

Cashen almost made Francesa assistant GM, broadcaster

Francesa

We may want to file this one under one of the most absurd of all time.

Thanks to BobsBlitz.com, we can report to you that on yesterday’s show, Mike Francesa announced that in the late ’80s, former and late New York Mets General Manager J. Frank Cashen offered him two positions — as assistant general manager and as a member the broadcasting team.

Mike, of course, knowing at the time how successful Mike & The Mad Dog would become (the show was in its infancy at the time, he says), declined Cashen’s offer.

“I want to stay on the air,” he said. “I want to stay at the FAN.”

You have to see this to believe it.

Click here to read the Blitz report and to see the video.

What are your thoughts? Comment here, on Google+ or on our Facebook Group.

Happy to announce my affiliation with BobsBlitz.com

FROM PORT ST. LUCIE, Fla. —

I am very happy to announce today my new affiliation with the great website Bob’s Blitz -- over at www.BobsBlitz.com. I have the great title of “Senior Writer,” one of the few I’ve actually never held officially before in two-plus decades in journalism.

I’ve known Bob for many years now -- and have always been a huge fan of his work. On the site, you’ll find pop-culture, sports, etc., that you just rarely find elsewhere. There is a lot of Mike Francesa material, Boomer & Carton stuff, hot babes, crazy Youtube finds and so much more.

I hope you’ll check out not just my stuff there, but all the work Bob puts into the site on daily-except-for-Sunday basis. I think you will like what you see -- especially if you’re a sports fan or sports-radio fan in New York City or North Jersey.

Cheers!
— Canessa

Chris Christie, our ‘governor,’ and anti-Devils fan | Rangers fan, played softball for Boomer Esiason in shorts

The love-fest between my least-favourite governor and the single-worst radio show anywhere period is enough to make the stomach turn --that is, of course, until Gov. Chris Christie’s legs were shown bare. Second-most nausea -- caused by Carton calling the governor “Chris.” What a disrespectful little bald-headed weasel.  Then again, they are “friends.”

Gov. Chris Christie, R, on his ass at a softball game at Yankee Stadium.

Now with all this said, great job by all at the game, including the governor, for playing the Bombers Boomer Broadway Softball Classic at Yankee Stadium to benefit the Wounded Warrior Project.

Also, well done by the governor saying he’d rather be playing at Citi Field than Yankee Stadium.

Here’s a love-fest video of Carton with Christie on the air, recapping the game. H/T to Bob Mantz and BobsBlitz.com for this one.

A new addition to this site: Talking about sports-talk radio

PORT ST. LUCIE, Fla. —

Those who know me well know I used to do an Internet TV/radio hybrid show on Shovio and DarpaTV -- and I started out doing so with the great Sid Rosenberg, formerly of WFAN and now of WMEN in Miami. While I haven’t done a show since March, I still have a great affection for sports-talk radio -- and radio in general -- so in the coming weeks, you may start to see items related to sports-talk radio or talk radio in general.

It won’t always be related to the Devils, but then again, if we waited for Devils-related sports-talk on the radio, there would never be material, especially considering their own flagship radio rarely, if ever, allows calls about the Devils.

One thing about that. Many hosts over the years have claimed it is because Devils fans never call the station. I’ve never quite seen it that way. I truly believe fans of this team would call if they felt they were welcome to do so.

There have been times, over the years, where I’d call the station -- and the screeners would say, “Are you sure you want to talk about the Devils? Mike isn’t exactly well-versed on your team.”

That is true, for sure.

But I still believe more would call if the chances presented themselves more over the winter months.

There were, after all, plenty of calls in the 2012 post-season.

At any rate, coming soon -- more on talk radio.

Caller names 2 fake LA Kings, Francesa has no ‘ideer’ he’s being punked by the caller

NEW YORK —

This is priceless. A caller calls Mike Francesa, of WFAN, goes on to name two faux Kings -- and of course, Mike wouldn’t know the difference anyway. I might expect this from Tony Paige, but his Holiness? You know he doesn’t know what to say when he begins asking little callers questions. Have a look.

@DonLaGreca nearly had an M.I. calling Game 1 of the Finals

LaGreca

LOS ANGELES —

Don LaGreca is one of the nicest guys you are going to find in the radio business and in the NHL. The Devils fan is a sideline reporter for the Rangers Radio Network and fills in when Kenny Albert is unavailable to do radio.

And Kenny wasn’t available to do Game 1 as he was calling the game on TV for NBC since Doc Emrick had a death in his family.

What follows is LaGreca’s call of the final minute of regulation of Game no. 1 of the Finals. It’s one of the best hockey radio calls I’ve ever heard, hands down. The passion here was palpable. And actually made me nervous listening to it on a replay.

Be sure your speakers aren’t too high — or your might wake someone or shatter an eardrum.

The hat is tipped to Bob Mantz and Bob’s Blitz, a website you should be reading daily.

Here in Port St. Lucie, Fla., Devils games come in more clear than Panthers games do

Have a listen for yourself -- from tonight’s game as heard in a car on WCBS Newsradio 88 -- nearly 1,200 miles from the transmitter. NOTE: You may hear some interference -- in Spanish. I’m told it’s from a powerful radio station in Cuba.

Devils overflow games now on WCBS Newsradio 880

In the past, when there were conflicts with the Nets, the Devils usually got preference on WFAN. Not anymore or as much.

When there are conflicts, however, the Devils games are now being broadcast on WCBS Newsradio 880 on your AM dial.

This Floridian loves this because after 6 p.m., WCBS’s signal here in Port St. Lucie often comes in clearer than WFAN’s and amazingly, always comes in clearer than the signal of any of the Miami or West Palm Beach signals.

What I need to figure out is what happens with the online broadcast. In the past, WCBS would continue its news operations online when the Yankees were on their radio airwaves — but that is because MLB games are not streamed for free as NHL games are.

My guess is that since NBA games aren’t streamed free either, the Devils broadcasts are still heard on WFAN.com. Update to come.

Chico was great on with Joel yesterday; some highlights of his chat

Chico Resch was great yesterday when he went on my dear friend Joel the Mouth’s radio program. Here are some highlights of what he said because, of course, yesterday was the first time the Internet stream didn’t work properly (and I was thus unable to record the segment).

— He mentioned the obvious, that the Devils do need to score more, especially when Cory Schneider is in net. And, the team went out and did just that for him last night in Raleigh.

— He was dismayed that Marty would have even said he’s no longer the no. 1 goalie on this team. He said he will be the no. 1 goalie until he leaves or retires.

— Though he was again dismayed by the reports, he did say it would be fine if Marty were to accept a trade at the end of this season to go to a team that had a chance to win a Stanley Cup.

— Watching Jaromir Jagr’s resurgence has been one of the most enjoyable things for Chico, he says, in some time.

— Joel asked Chico a question for me about the team’s pitiful attendance this season. I learned something I had never known before yesterday. Each game, there are two attendance figures — one is the one we see in the box-scores and the other is a turnstile count that goes to the league and club executives.

I always believed the announced attendance should be the turnstile count — and there is apparently a mechanism to do just that. What I wouldn’t give to see the nightly turnstile count.

— He refused to place blame on Darcy Regier in Buffalo. In fact, he says some of the final trades that he made before he was fired (Matt Moulson, etc.) will turn out to be extremely beneficial for the Sabres — though it might take three years before the fruits of those trades are noticed.

My latest on-air segment with The Mouth: Lots of Devils-Rangers talk

My most recent show, KC in 60, with a 10-minute Devils rant

Some of you may already know, but for those who don't, from 2009-2012, I did a show, KC in 60, online, where I talked hockey, news, politics and other sports. I resurrected the show — and will be doing it every Tuesday at 9 p.m. This week, I opened with a rant on the struggling NJ Devils. Here it is. Enjoy.

My weekly NHL call to Marc Eisenberg on 640 Sports WMEN South Florida

Eisenberg

We talk our usual NHL stuff — including the Flyers, Devils, Hawks, Bruins, Canadiens and more.

Eisey is a huge fan of hockey — and he talks about it on the air. You can listen live, most Sundays from 10 a.m. to noon or 1 p.m., by clicking here.

Or, if you're in South Florida, tune in at 640 on your radio's AM dial.

My radio chat with broadcasting legends Doug Miles and Don Henderson on our NJ Devils

Kenny Daneyko with Zach Gelb on WHIP in Philly

My buddy Zach Gelb, who now does a show on WHIP at Temple University in Philly, had our Kenny Daneyko on his show the other day. Here's the interview. Thanks, Gelbie, for the video.

Weekly call on WMEN 640 Sports with the great Marc Eisenberg

Lockout has bumped Devils off WFAN more than usual in '13

NEW YORK CITY —

In most seasons, the New Jersey Devils take priority on WFAN radio on most nights when there is a conflict between the Nets and Devils (games on the same day/time). But it's been different this year, and the lockout is to blame, WFAN's boss Mark Chernoff told me today.

"It's only because of the lockout and some Devils dates that weren't there originally came after the lockout ended," Chernoff said. "And the Nets had already made their arrangements."

Generally, the pecking order with conflicts are Mets, Giants, Devils and then the Nets. But not always.

WFAN's Mark Chernoff

"Also, we do discuss in advance of the season some dates where we might make some changes to carry a Nets game," Chernoff said.

When there are conflicts, the Devils will be moved, for the most part, to WBBR 1130 AM.

There are no apparent plans to put one team on AM and another on FM as had been done in Philadelphia when the Phillies and Flyers were both slated for simultaneous games on WIP. (The Flyers have moved broadcasts on to another station this season anyway).

This week's commentary from The Sid Rosenberg Show — WMEN 640 Sports South Florida

A little Panthers and some Devils.

Speaking of the Panthers, you've got to hear some of Randy Moller's goal calls — they were funny then, and they're still funny now

The Canessa Commentary
By KEVIN CANESSA Jr.

SUNRISE, Fla. —

Randy Moller

My satirical look at the Florida Panthers today made me realize something — the fans of the Devils need to learn some more about Panthers' radio play-by-play announcer Randy Moller, a former NHL defenseman who spent some time in the tri-state area with the New York Rangers.

Several years ago, Moller went to work for the Florida Panthers — and he quickly became the team's radio voice. And I must say — I'm not sure I enjoy a radio play-by-play announcer's work as much as I do Moller's.

In fact, last year, when our Devils played the Panthers in the first round, I purposefully made sure to listen to his call on the radio (online) while pausing the TV games to get the PBP lined up properly with all the delays.

It's not just how well he knows the game either — or how much of a true Canadian radio voice he has (and boy does he ever have a forceful presence on the air).

It's what he does after each Panthers' goal is scored.

It started, he told me a few years ago, when the Panthers were on 790 The Ticket in Miami, where Dan Lebatard does his daily radio show. Someone on the show coaxed Randy into saying a line from a movie at a game — and now, it's a staple after every Panthers' goal.

Moller's 1992 hockey card.

There are exceptions — Moller told me in an interview I'll embed here that he doesn't go nuts with the calls when the team is losing badly. But, he says, he gets tons of suggestions on lines to use. And, proudly, he says he's never once used the same line twice.

That's how popular the calls have become.

When Doc Emrick retired last season, there was a part of me that hoped Randy would find a way to come to our Devils to work. But Moller is very well comfortable working for the Panthers — and let's face it, there's probably not a better organization to work for than the Panthers.

His goal calls have become part of South Florida culture. And they're very, very entertaining. And combined with his excellent pure PBP skills, to me, there's no one better calling games on the radio than Randy. Period.

And if you've never heard them, you should take a listen now to some of his calls (I'm embedding two sets — and there are tons more on Youtube).

Chances are, you'll enjoy them.

And if you don't, call me the fool.

It's not hockey, but it's my first new on-air commentary on the Sid Rosenberg Show: Ray Lewis